ARNOLD. " GEOFFREY can't come, so he has sent me. I know your situation,
and shall have to feel for you if it gets much darker and they don't
bring candles. That is, if I'm to shake hands with you. I have told
everybody here that you are my wife. Let's have a little game of
seven-up, and pass the time profitably."

ANNIE. "Oh, villain (I mean GEOFFREY,) you have de-ser-er-erted me. Oh,
rash young person, (I mean you, ARNOLD,) I'm inclined to think that
you've married me by Scotch law, without having meant it. If so, you'll
have to go to America and see BEECHER about a divorce." (_Curtain
subsequently falls, and_ STOEPEL _orders the big drum to beat for an
hour, while the musicians take advantage of the noise to tune their
instruments.) Deaf old gentleman remarks again that he does like_
WAGNER'S _music. Half the audience hold their ears, while the other half
flee madly away until the entr' acte is over_.

ACT III.--GEOFFREY _boxes with his trainer, and slings Indian clubs and
wooden dumb-bells_.

GEOFFREY. "There! Thank heaven I didn't break anything. The scenery, the
footlights, or a bloodvessel will get broken before the week is out,
however, if this prize-ring business isn't cut out. Here comes ARNOLD."

ARNOLD. "How's Miss SYLVESTER?"

GEOFFREY. "If you say anything more about her, I'll put a head on you.
She's your wife. You're a married man."

ARNOLD. "_Married_! You infamous editor of a two cent daily paper; I