her husband alludes to this afflictive occurrence in the following
memorandum:--


12 _mo_. 10.--How varied is our passing along in this vale of tears!
First-day last was a day of brightness, and this day has been one of
comparative death and darkness. I have been made to know something of the
saying recorded by the prophet,--"Who is among you that feareth the Lord,"
&c., "that walketh in darkness and hath no light." This has appeared to be
my portion this day, and I find it hard work to "trust in the name of the
Lord and stay upon my God."


Some further remarks in his diary for this day turn upon the subject of
the ministry, and the passage he quotes shows how deep and heart-searching
is the work of preparation for an enlarged and effectual gospel ministry,
whatever be the denomination among men to which the preacher belongs:--


In the course of reading the life of Mary Fletcher I find much deep
instruction and encouragement. Many of her remarks have proved like a goad
to spur me on in the way of holiness. An extract made by her from Dr.
Doddridge's life aptly speaks the language of my heart, when in my silent
breathing to the Almighty I am led to crave an enlargement of my gift in
spiritual things:--

"There must be an enlargement of soul before any remarkable success on
others; and a great diligence in prayer and strict watchfulness over my
own soul previous to any remarkable and habitual enlargement in my
ministry; and deep humiliation must precede both."