An evening paper correspondent has complained that he has searched
the shops in vain for a tortoise. So far the various Government
Departments have maintained a dignified silence.

***

It is all nonsense for a contemporary to say that the blizzard in the
North on a recent Saturday did no damage. Several of the football
results were delayed.

***

While visiting Seaton College, New York, the other day, Mr. ROOSEVELT
saluted a statue of ALEXANDER THE GREAT. We have always maintained
that there is nothing petty about the EX-PRESIDENT.

***

The most striking announcement of the year 1917 comes just when it is
almost used up. "There is a steady demand for money," says a Stock
Exchange report.

***

A mummified duck, estimated to be two thousand years old, has been
discovered in a sandstone stratum in Iowa. It is not often that the
poulterers of Iowa are caught napping.

***