An American policeman is said to have written two successful musical
comedies. If we remember rightly it was an English policeman who first
composed the Frog's March.

***

At a Guildford charity fête the winner of a hurdle race was awarded a
new-laid egg. If he succeeds in winning it three years in succession
it is to become his own property.

***

The L.B. & S.C. Railway desire to state that the train from which the
deserter jumped without injuring himself was not really doing its
best.

***

A burglar was discovered concealed beneath the counter of a Leicester
butter-merchant's shop. It is understood that he came early to avoid
the rush.

* * * * *

[Illustration: _Manager_. "WHY DON'T YOU GET IN THE MIDDLE OF THE
STAGE?"

_Tenor_ (_haughtily_). "I PREFER STAYING WHERE I AM."