"What is your name, and where are you from ?"

The answer was, "Mr. So-and-So, from Boston."

"You may come in," said St. Peter, "but I know you won't like it."



_She Felt Bad When Well_

An old lady, really quite well, was always complaining and "enjoying
poor health," as she expressed it. Her various ailments were to her
the most interesting topic in the world. One day a neighbor found her
eating a hearty meal, and asked her how she was.

"Poor me," she sighed, "I feel very well, but I always feel bad when I
feel well, because I know I am going to feel worse afterward."



_Drove Him Mad_

They took him to the sanatorium moaning feebly: "Thirty-nine,
thirty-nine."

"What does he mean by that?" the attendant inquired.

"It's the number of buttons on the back of his wife's new frock," the
family doctor explained.