Bah! What _are_ they fit for, these stupid old rules?
To be shaped by rich tyrants, obeyed by poor fools!

* * * * *

QUEER QUERIES.

ENGLISH HISTORY.--I have been reading several books on this subject,
and am rather puzzled. Are the English people, _as existing now_,
Teutons, or Danes, or Celts, or what? Can we be Teutons when the
aborigines of these islands were not Teutonic? I feel that my own
genius--and I have a lot--is Celtic; at the same time I have always
prided myself on my Norman blood; yet from my liking for the sea,
which never makes me sick, at least at Herne Bay, I fancy I must
be descended from a Scandinavian Viking. What is the ethnological
name given to a person who is an amalgamation of such heterogeneous
elements?--INQUIRER.

* * * * *

[Illustration: TOUCHING CONFIDENCE IN THE FOG.

_Gentleman of Engaging Manners._ "BLESS YOUR 'EART, YOU'LL BE HALL
RIGHT ALONG O' ME, MUM! LET ME KERRY THE LITTLE BAG FOR YOU, MUM!!"]

* * * * *

THE BRUM AND THE OOLOGIST.

[Mr. W. JAMES asked the LORD ADVOCATE whether his attention