Half _Ass_, half _Puppet_, and the least of _Man_;
One that seems just for Nature's Pastime made,
A _Gawdy_ Carcass, with an _Empty Head_;
Whose only _Knowledge_ lies in _modish Dress_,
And seldom looks much further than his Glass.
A Creature only Govern'd by his Will;
And never _Reads_ above a _Taylors Bill_;
A Wretch extreamly _Whimsical_ and _Proud_,
Stiff in _Opinion, Talkative_ and _Loud_;
And that which most Compleatly Arms the _Fool_,
Is, That the _Fop's_ Emphatically dull.
That such, _Melissa_, may Address, 'tis true,
Write a soft _Song_, or senseless _Billetdoux_,
But 'tis _Themselves_ they _Admire_ in't, not _You_:
And she that's basely Yok'd with one of these,
Must e'en be Wedded to his _Vanities_;
Doat on a _Thing_ that scarce deserves a Name,
While he with _Slights_ rewards her Vertuous Flame:
For tell me, can he less _Indifferent_ prove,
Who thinks no Woman can Deserve his Love?
No, no, _Melissa_, never think he can;
For if you do, you're Cozen'd in your Man.

Self-Affectation sways his little Sense;
Nought but _Himself_ he Loves, and _Ignorance_.
By fatal Chance, if such a Man you Wed,
Better, _Melissa_, thou had'st Dy'd a Maid:
Ev'n such a Lover, were a Plague too great;
From such a Husband, Guard me, Oh my Fate!