[Footnote 1: Oysters are to be six shillings a dozen this winter!! How
many of the ordinarily careless will now be compelled to go by RULES
without going in for Oysters. N.B.--"Action" in these verses is poetic
license for "summons."]

* * * * *

"SAVE ME FROM MY FRIENDS!"

SCENE--_A Place of Meeting. Enter Parliamentary Leader and
his Subordinate. They greet one another effusively._

_Leader_ (_cordially_). And now, my dear fellow, how are my interests?

_Sub._ (_with much heartiness_). Getting on capitally! Just been
writing to all the papers to say that it is stupid to call you "Old
Dot-and-go-one," because it is inapplicable to either your age or your
mode of controversy.

_Lead._ (_with a feeble smile_). That _was_ kind of you! But who had
said it?

_Sub._ (_airily_). Oh, someone of about fourth-rate importance! and it
had been quite forgotten you know. So I dragged it up again, and put
it all right for you.

_Lead._ (_shaking hands_). Thanks, so very much. But if persons had
forgotten it, why revert to it?