"All these here things I heerd fr'm Hogan an' see in th' pa-apers. I
invied this wondherful nation. I wisht, sometimes, th' Lord hadn't given
me two blue an' sometimes red eyes an' this alkiline nose, but a nose
like an ear an' a couple iv shoe-buttons f'r eyes. I wanted to be a Jap
an' belong to th' higher civvylization. Hogan had a Jap frind that used
to come in here with him. Hogan thought he was a Prince, but he was a
cook an' a student in a theelogical siminry. They'd talk be th' hour
about th' beauties iv what Hogan called th' Flowery Kingdom. 'Oh,
wondherful land,' says Hogan. 'Land iv chrysanthymums an' cherry
blossoms a' gasyhee girls,' says he. 'Japan is a beautiful land,' says
Prince Okoko. 'Nippon, (that's th' name it goes by at home,) Nippon, I
salute ye,' says Hogan. 'May victhry perch upon ye'er banners, an' may
ye hammer our old frinds an' allies fr'm Mookden to Moscow. Banzai,'
says he. An' they embraced. That night, in ordher to help on th' cause,
Hogan bought a blue flower-pot fr'm th' Prince's collection f'r eighteen
dollars. He took it home undher his ar-rm in th' rain an' th' next
mornin' most iv th' flower-pot was on his new overcoat an' th' rest was
meltin' all over th' flure.

"That was the beginnin' iv th' end iv th' frindship between th' two
gr-reat nations that owe thimselves so much. About th' time Hogan got
th' flower-pot, th' fire-sale ads an' th' Rooshyan outrage news both
stopped in th' newspa-apers. A well-known fi-nanceer who thravelled to
Tokeeo with a letter iv inthraduction to th' Mickydoo fr'm th' Prisidint
beginnin' 'Dear mick,' got a brick put through his hat as he wint to
visit th' foorth assistant to th' manicure iv th' eighth assistant to
th' plumber iv th' bricklayer iv th' Mickydoo, which is th' nearest to
his Majesty that foreign eyes ar-re permitted to look upon. A little
later a number iv Americans in private life who wint over to rayceive