audience, would beat Mr. Bunn into fits, and the German company into
fiddle-cases; so, like a newspaper legacy, which is the only one that
never pays duty, we "_leave_ it to our reader's imagination."

The die was cast. Mr. Horatio Fitzharding Fitzfunk's former avocations
became intensely irksome--if he served a writ it was no longer a "writ of
right." Copies for "Jenkins" were consigned to "Tompkins;" "Brown"
declined pleading to "Smith" and Smith declared off Brown's declaration.
In inquiries after "solvent acceptors," Mr. Horatio Fitzharding Fitzfunk
was still more abroad. In the mystification of his brains, all answers
seemed to be delivered "per contra." Forlorn hopes on three-and sixpenny
stamps were converted into the circulating medium; "good actors" were
considered "good men" in the very reverse of Shylock's acceptation of the
term; and astonished indorsers succeeded in "raising the wind" upon
"kites" they would have bet any odds no "wind in the world could induce to
fly." Everything in this world must come to an end--bills generally do in
three months: so did these, and so did Mr. Horatio Fitzharding Fitzfunk's
responsible and peripatetic avocations in the highly respectable firm of
Messrs. Tims and Swindle, attorneys, and to their cost, through the agency
of Mr. Horatio Fitzharding Fitzfunk, bill-discounters, of Thavies' Inn,
Holborn; they, the said highly respectable firm of Tims and Swindle,
handing over to Mr. Horatio Fitzharding Fitzfunk the sum of four and
tenpence, being the balance of his quarter's salary, which, so great was
Mr. Horatio Fitzharding Fitzfunk's opinion of the solvency of the said
highly respectable firm, he had allowed to remain undrawn in their hands,
together with a note utterly and totally declining any further service or
assistance as "_in_" or "_out_door" or any sort of clerk at all, from Mr.
Horatio Fitzharding Fitzfunk, and amiably recommending the said Horatio to
apply elsewhere for a character; the which advice Mr. Horatio Fitzharding
Fitzfunk attended to instanter, and received, in consideration of the sum