(_A SKETCH AT EARL'S COURT._)

_The Orator's Opening Discourse_ (_as heard in the back rows_). Ladies
and Gentlemen, I desire to draw your attention to an important fact.
It will be my pleasure to introduce to you ... ("_The real American
popcorn, equally famous in Paris and London, tuppence each packet!"
from Vendor in gangway_) ... history and life of the ... (_"'Buffalo
Bill Puzzle,' one penny!" from another vendor behind_) ... impress
one fact upon your minds; this is not ... (_roar and rattle of
passing train_) ... in the ordinary or common acceptation of ...
(_"Puff-puff-puff!" from engine shunting trucks_) ... Many unthinking
persons have said ... (_Piercing and prolonged scream from same
engine._) This is not so. On the contrary ... (_Metallic bangs from
trucks._) Men and animals are ... ("_Programmes! Opera-glasses on
hire!_") ... purely the creatures of ...

[_Remainder of remarks hopelessly lost amidst the clank of
coupling chains, whistles, snorts and puffs from shunting
engine._

_An Old Lady in Audience._ He has such a beautiful clear voice,
we _ought_ to hear every word. If _I_ were Buffalo BILL, I should
positively insist on the trains keeping quiet while the Orator was
speaking!

_Orator_ (_during the Grand Processional Review_). A Troop of Arapahoe
Indians!

[_Band strikes up; a party of painted Indians gallop into