Candour_ (the new heroine of the comedy) being not only possible but
natural. Mr. ASCHE himself will play _Charles Surface_, with the accent on
the surface, since he turns out to be a devotee of sun-baths and the simple
life.

In reply to a cablegram to America, Sir HERBERT BEERBOHM TREE sends the
following message:--"Am busy rehearsing _He Stoops to Cinema; or, The
Mistakes of a Knight_."

* * * * *

[Illustration: UNPLEASANT NIGHTMARE OF HANS, THE EX-CINEMA ATTENDANT, AFTER
LEARNING OF THE AMERICAN DECLARATION OF WAR.]

* * * * *

FOOD CONTROL.

There is no truth in the rumour that there is to be a "sauceless" day for
our Post-Office employees.

* * * * *

"The Craven Stakes of 500 sobs."--_Evening News_ (_Portsmouth_).

Horse-racing in war-time _is_ rather a sorry business.

* * * * *

"A lady giving up her electromobile, on account of the war, which is in