"A Berlin official telegram states that the Kaiser has sent the
following telegram to the Crown Prince:--'The troops of all the German
tribes under your command, with steel-hard determination and strongly
led, have brought to failure the great French attempt to break through
on the Aisne and in Champagne. Also there, again, the infantry had to
bear the grunt.'"--_Northern Whig._

The Imperial euphemism, we suppose, for the cry of "Kamerad!"

* * * * *

THE NEW RATIONS.

"Joint Hospital Board, ----, 14th April, 1917. The above Board require
two Probationer Nurses for their Consumption."--_Provincial Paper._

* * * * *

A correspondent having observed in a morning paper the headline,
"Pomeranians Surrender!" sends us a suggested contents-bill for _The
Barking Gazette_:--

GREAT CAPTURE OF POMS!
PEKINESE BREAK OFF RELATIONS.
GREAT DANES NEUTRAL.
RAID BY TERRITORIAL FLYING CORPS
(SKY TERRIERS).
ROUT OF DALMATIANS.
FIELD-GREYHOUNDS DRIVEN OFF.