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Broken Homes - A Study of Family Desertion and its Social Treatment by Joanna C. Colcord
page 36 of 158 (22%)
than have him arrested before an attempt to talk the matter out with
him. More stringent measures, they believe, can be resorted to
later--but the man must first be convinced that he will be listened to
patiently and with the intent to deal fairly. The case worker knows that
the power of the human mind to "rationalize" anti-social conduct is
infinite; and that, besides the few "justifiable deserters," there are
many who have succeeded in convincing themselves that their action is
warrantable. A deserter who could allege nothing else against his wife,
averred that he had placed under the bed two matches, crossed, and a
week later found them in the same position, proving his contention that
she was slovenly and did not keep the rooms clean.

The man who, aided by a sore conscience, has worked himself into such a
state of mind as this must be permitted to talk himself out before he
can be made to see the true state of affairs. In the minds of both man
and woman there is likely to be found a superstructure of suspicion,
jealousy, misinterpretation and distrust, built upon the basic fact of
their incompatibility, which has to be pulled down before the true
causes can be probed. To arrest a man in this state of mind is in his
eyes simply to "take sides" against him. Eventually he may have to be
arrested, but, in the case worker's experience, the chances of success
are ten to one if the man can be induced to take some voluntary step
toward reconciliation without the intervention of the law. In many
instances a real interview with the man, while not exonerating him,
would have thrown new light on the woman's statements.

A family social work society writes: A young woman with her mother
and little boy were referred for aid by a medical social department
because her husband had deserted and she was unable to work. The
doctors feared that her breakdown would result in insanity, so they
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