THE LIFE

They were two sweet young American girls, able, beautiful, versatile,
patriotic to the core, rushed to death. And one of them said
breathlessly:

"What have you been doing?"

And the other one as breathlessly replied:

"Doing! My dear, I hate to tell you. I got up at six. I drove a car
forty miles to camp. I knitted a sweater and a pair of socks in between.
I went to a Red Cross meeting. I acted as bridesmaid. I read a book on
the war. I took a last lesson in first aid. I canned eighty cans of
vegetables and, oh--!"

"Do tell me!"

"Why, will you believe me, I have been so busy all day that I almost
forgot to get married!"


WELCOMING THE ACTOR

A well-known society performer volunteered to entertain a roomful of
patients of the Colney Hatch Lunatic Asylum, and made up a very
successful little monologue show, entirely humorous. The audience in the
main gave symptoms of being slightly bored, but one highly intelligent
maniac saw the whole thing in the proper light, and, clapping the