talented actor on the shoulder, said: "Glad you've come, old fellow. You
and I will get along fine. The other dippies here are so dashed
dignified. What I say is if a man is mad, he needn't put on airs about
it."


COULDN'T BE BOTHERED

Mose approached the registration booth hesitatingly, and being accosted
by the official in charge, assured that dignitary that he had just
walked ten miles to register.

"Well, Mose, what branch of the service would you like to be placed
in?" inquired the official.

"How about the cavalry?"

"What will Ah have ter do in de calvary?"

"Oh, you won't have to do anything but ride a horse all the time."

Mose scratched his woolly noggin in perplexity for a few moments, and
finally said: "Nawssur, Ah don't believe Ah wants ter jine the calvary."

"What's the matter with the cavalry, Mose?"

"Well, yer see, boss, hit's jest like dis: When y'awl blow dem bugles
ter retreet, Ah don't want ter be troubled wid no hoss."