"_Will_ you keep quiet, or must I make you?" asked Cecilia.

"Well, of course," I went on, "finding ourselves suddenly attacked by a
common foe, Chris and I naturally joined forces to defend ourselves."

"Defend!--" shrieked John. "No, I won't keep quiet another second. Defend!
Why, they rushed at me like a couple of wild hyenas."

"My dear John," said Cecilia, "_you_ attacked them first, and of course
they defended themselves as best they could."

"Precisely," I said.

"After all, John," said Cecilia, "you ought to be glad your son is so ready
to look after himself, instead of calling him a hooligan. You're always
shouting about the noble art of self-defence."

"Noble art of self-defence _rot_," said John. "There's nothing in the noble
art about pushing lead soldiers down a man's neck."

"Down your neck?" said Cecilia.

"Yes," said John. "I keep trying to tell you and you won't let me. That
brute sat on the small of my back while Christopher pushed 'em down. The
little beasts all had their bayonets fixed, too."

Cecilia and I laughed.

"Yes, laugh," said John bitterly. "It _is_ funny that our child should be