* * *

"There is still a great shortage of gold in the country," announces a
weekly paper. It certainly seems as if our profiteers will soon have to be
content with having their teeth stopped with bank-notes.

* * *

We regret to learn that the amateur gardener whose marrows were awarded the
second prize for cooking-apples at a horticultural show is still confined
to his bed.

* * *

A neck-ruffle originally worn by QUEEN ELIZABETH has been stolen from a
house in Manchester and has not yet been recovered. Any reader noticing a
suspicious-looking person wearing such an article over her _décolleté_
should immediately communicate with the nearest police-station.

* * *

Hair tonic, declares the Washington Chief of Police, is growing in
popularity as a beverage. The danger of this habit has been widely
advertised by the sad case of a Chicago man who drank three shampoo
cocktails and afterwards swallowed a hair in his soup.

* * *

The mystery of the City gentleman who has been noticed lately going up to