relatives were anxious about his health, and his mother, so far from
being mortified, rather rejoiced when she learned that he had become a
real man, and had enticed the French mistress of some friend of his.
As to the Katiousha episode--that the thought might occur to him of
marrying her, she could not even think of without horror.

Similarly, when Nekhludoff, on reaching his majority, distributed the
estate he inherited from his father among the peasants, because he
considered the ownership of land unjust, this act of his horrified his
mother and relatives, who constantly reproached and ridiculed him for
it. He was told unceasingly that so far from enriching it only
impoverished the peasants, who opened three liquor stores and stopped
working entirely. When, however, Nekhludoff joined the Guards, and
spent and gambled away so much money that Elena Ivanovna had to draw
from her capital, she scarcely grieved, considering it quite natural
and even beneficial to be thus inoculated when young and in good
society.

Nekhludoff at first struggled, but the struggle was very hard, for
whatever he did, following the faith that was in him, was considered
wrong by others, and, contrariwise, whatever he considered wrong was
approved of by his relatives. The result was that Nekhludoff ceased to
have faith in himself and began to follow others. At first this
renunciation of self was unpleasant, but it was short lived, and
Nekhludoff, who now began to smoke and drink wine, soon ceased to
experience this unpleasant feeling, and was even greatly relieved.

Passionate by nature, Nekhludoff gave himself up entirely to this new
life, approved of by all those that surrounded him, and completely
stifled in himself that voice which demanded something different. It