SCENE 2.--The Same.


Col. Starbottle (entering, to DON JOSE). Overlooking the insult
of--er--inebriated individual, whose menial position in this--er--
er--household precludes a demand for personal satisfaction, sir, I
believe I have the honor of addressing Don Jose Castro. Very good,
sir. Permit me, sir, to introduce myself as Col. Culpepper
Starbottle--demn me! the legal adviser of Mr. Alexander Morton,
sen., and I may add, sir, the friend of that gentleman, and as
such, sir--er--er--personally--personally responsible.

Alexander Morton (puritanically and lugubriously). As a God-
fearing man and forgiving Christian, Mr. Castro, I trust you will
overlook the habitual profanity of the erring but well-meaning man,
who, by the necessities of my situation, accompanies me. I am the
person--a helpless sinner--mentioned in the letters which I believe
have preceded me. As a professing member of the Cumberland
Presbyterian Church, I have ventured, in the interest of works
rather than faith, to overlook the plain doctrines of the church in
claiming sympathy of a superstitious Papist.

Starbottle (interrupting, aside to ALEXANDER MORTON). Ahem! ahem!
(Aloud to DON JOSE.) My friend's manner, sir, reminds me of--er--
er--Ram Bootgum Sing, first secretary of Turkish legation at
Washington in '45; most remarkable man--demn me--most remarkable--
and warm personal friend. Challenged Tod Robinson for putting him
next to Hebrew banker at dinner, with remark--demn me--that they
were both believers in the profit! he, he! Amusing, perhaps;