bring me suthin to Talk!" He brung me sum noospapers, for
which I thanked him kindly.

At larst I got a interview with Jefferson Davis, the President
of the Southern Conthieveracy. He was quite perlite, and axed
me to sit down and state my case. I did it, when he larfed
and said his gallunt men had been a little 2 enthoosiastic in
confisticatin my show.

"Yes," sez I, "they confisticated me too muchly. I had sum
hosses confisticated in the same way onct, but the
confisticaters air now poundin stun in the States Prison in
Injinnapylus."

"Wall, wall Mister Ward, you air at liberty to depart; you air
friendly to the South, I know. Even now we hav many frens in
the North, who sympathize with us, and won't mingle with this
fight."

"J. Davis, there's your grate mistaik. Many of us was your
sincere frends, and thought certin parties amung us was fussin
about you and meddlin with your consarns intirely too much.
But J. Davis, the minit you fire a gun at the piece of dry-
goods called the Star-Spangled Banner, the North gits up and
rises en massy, in defence of that banner. Not agin you as
individooals,--not agin the South even--but to save the flag.
We should indeed be weak in the knees, unsound in the heart,
milk-white in the liver, and soft in the hed, if we stood
quietly by, and saw this glorus Govyment smashed to pieces,
either by a furrin or a intestine foe. The gentle-harted