I was droven to my hotel by the most melancholly driver of a
four-wheeler that I ever saw. He heaved a deep sigh as I gave
him two shillings.

"I'll give you six d.'s more," I said, "if it hurts you so."

"It isn't that," he said, with a hart-rendin groan, "it's only a
way I have. My mind's upset to-day. I at one time tho't I'd
drive you into the Thames. I've been readin in all the daily
papers to try and understand about Governor Ayre, and my mind is
totterin. It's really wonderful I didn't drive you into the
Thames."

I asked the onhappy man what his number was, so I could redily
find him in case I should want him agin, and bad him good-bye.
And then I tho't what a frollicksome day I'd made of it.

Respectably, &c.
Artemus Ward.

5.7. SCIENCE AND NATURAL HISTORY.

MR. PUNCH, My dear Sir,--I was a little disapinted in not
receivin a invitation to jine in the meetins of the Social
Science Congress.

I don't exackly see how they go on without me.

I hope it wasn't the intentions of the Sciencers to exclood me