should not I give her a ruble also? In the opinion of the cook's
wife, such a bestowal of money is precisely the same as the flinging
of honey-cakes to the people by gentlemen; it furnishes the people
who have a great deal of superfluous cash with amusement. I was
mortified because the mistake made by the cook's wife demonstrated to
me distinctly the view which she, and all people who are not rich,
must take of me: "He is flinging away his folly, i.e., his unearned
money."

As a matter of fact, what is my money, and whence did it come into my
possession? A portion of it I accumulated from the land which I
received from my father. A peasant sold his last sheep or cow in
order to give the money to me. Another portion of my money is the
money which I have received for my writings, for my books. If my
books are hurtful, I only lead astray those who purchase them, and
the money which I receive for them is ill-earned money; but if my
books are useful to people, then the issue is still more disastrous.
I do not give them to people: I say, "Give me seventeen rubles, and
I will give them to you." And as the peasant sells his last sheep,
in this case the poor student or teacher, or any other poor man,
deprives himself of necessaries in order to give me this money. And
so I have accumulated a great deal of money in that way, and what do
I do with it? I take that money to the city, and bestow it on the
poor, only when they fulfil my caprices, and come hither to the city
to clean my sidewalk, lamps, and shoes; to work for me in factories.
And in return for this money, I force from them every thing that I
can; that is to say, I try to give them as little as possible, and to
receive as much as possible from them. And all at once I begin,
quite unexpectedly, to bestow this money as a simple gift, on these
same poor persons, not on all, but on those to whom I take a fancy.