private purposes may be," he said, "I neither know nor seek to inquire.
It is plain that you are a gentleman of some simplicity, or of a
subtlety far too fine for my eyes of every day. Whichever you may be, I
admire. If you are candid in calling yourself a pilgrim I appreciate
your candour. If you are not, I appreciate even more your discretion.
But you will still let me observe that for a young gentleman of personal
attractions to walk half naked through an inquisitive nation, and to
give oracular replies to questions put him by officials (to say the
least of it) is to excite remark. I have some recommendations to make,
which I hope you'll pardon--as first, stockings; second, a pair of stout
walking-shoes; third, a hat; fourthly, some apparent calling beside that
of penitent. Penitence is a trade open to many objections; but for
those, I am sure I should have tried it myself. Of what, for instance,
do you repent? Is it murder? Is it coin-clipping? Is it--but I spare
your blushes. Besides, it can always be objected that, as there is
nothing to hinder your penitent fishmonger from trading in fish and
being truly contrite at the same time, so also your honour has the same
privilege before you. To be short, I recommend you to choose some
calling more plainly commercial."

I replied that he was very right, and that I would gladly embrace any
calling which would not hinder my design. To this he answered that I had
not done him the honour of explaining my design, but that he conceived
it to be that of walking about the country with as much discomfort as
possible. To this superficial judgment I, very naturally, demurred.

"You are dry, my dear sir," I said, "nor do I wonder. Allow me to tell
you my story, and I shall make you sweat with indignation." Omitting
names of persons and places, I thereupon detailed the whole of my case,
and concluded thus solemnly: "I hope that you now understand how I am