Niagara, an everlastin' Almighty big river called
Mississippi, and a parfect pictur of a wappin' big man
called Kentuckian there. Both t'other ones he'd seen over
and over agin, but Niagara he'd never sot eyes on.

"So as soon as he arrives, he goes into the public room,
and looks at the white waters, and, sais he, 'Waiter,'
sais he, 'is them the falls down there?' a-pintin' by
accident in the direction where the Falls actilly was.

"'Yes, Sir,' sais the waiter.

"'Hem!' sais Rufe, 'them's the Falls of Niagara, eh! So
I've seen the Falls at last, eh! Well it's pretty too:
they ain't bad, that's a fact. So them's the Falls of
Niagara! How long is it afore the stage starts?'

"'An hour, Sir.'

"'Go and book me for Boston, and then bring me a paper.'

"'Yes, Sir.'

"Well he got his paper and sot there a readin' of it,
and every now and then, he'd look out of the winder and
say: 'So them's the Falls of Niagara, eh? Well, it's a
pretty little mill privilege that too, ain't it; but it
ain't just altogether worth comin' so far to see. So I've
seen the Falls at last!'