When, in discoursing on each mimic elf,
We praise and censure with an eye to self;
All must meet friends, and Ackman[11] bids as fair,
In such a court, as Garrick, for the chair.
At length agreed, all squabbles to decide,
By some one judge the cause was to be tried;
But this their squabbles did afresh renew,
Who should be judge in such a trial:--who? 60
For Johnson some; but Johnson, it was fear'd,
Would be too grave; and Sterne[12] too gay appear'd;
Others for Franklin[13] voted; but 'twas known,
He sicken'd at all triumphs but his own:
For Colman[14] many, but the peevish tongue
Of prudent Age found out that he was young:
For Murphy[15] some few pilfering wits declared,
Whilst Folly clapp'd her hands, and Wisdom stared.
To mischief train'd, e'en from his mother's womb,
Grown old in fraud, though yet in manhood's bloom, 70
Adopting arts by which gay villains rise,
And reach the heights which honest men despise;
Mute at the bar, and in the senate loud,
Dull 'mongst the dullest, proudest of the proud;
A pert, prim, prater of the northern race,[16]
Guilt in his heart, and famine in his face,
Stood forth,--and thrice he waved his lily hand,
And thrice he twirled his tye, thrice stroked his band:--
At Friendship's call (thus oft, with traitorous aim,
Men void of faith usurp Faith's sacred name) 80
At Friendship's call I come, by Murphy sent,
Who thus by me develops his intent: