Punchinello, Volume 1, No. 08, May 21, 1870 by Various
page 40 of 71 (56%)
page 40 of 71 (56%)
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decorate, and if they didn't, they wouldn't.
Mr. DRAKE said Mr. DAVIS'S hands were dripping with loyal gore. Mr. DAVIS said he would reply to that insinuation the first leisure week he had. In the meantime he contented himself with hurling the foul slander back into Mr. DRAKE'S teeth, if Mr. DRAKE had any. Lest Mr. DAVIS should execute his threat of making a speech, the Senate referred the subject. Then there was a first-class wrangle about giving pensions to Mrs. LINCOLN and Mrs. RAWLINGS. It was represented that Mrs. LINCOLN was given up to riotous living upon pumpernickel and ganzebroost, at a German watering-place, and that there was a rumor afloat that unless Congress pensioned her at once, she might marry a German prince. Mr. SHERMAN, on behalf of the Finance Committee, represented that German princes were notoriously expensive and impecunious, and that it would be much cheaper to pension Mrs. LINCOLN alone than to pension her and a German prince together. He submitted some statements, showing what it had cost Great Britain to have German princes marrying into the Royal family. The Senate, therefore, incontinently passed the bill. Mr. Morrill introduced a neat little swindle, which does equal credit to his hand and heart, providing that the United States should have the free use of all patents granted under it. He said this was to discourage that pernicious class of men, the inventors. In many branches of industry, such as arms, the Government was the only customer of the inventor. In those cases, the inventor's gray hairs would be brought immediately to the grave. And inasmuch as the Government had a finger in |
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